Apathy

I wonder ... Why do I even bother? Why do I even care? Am I so similar to someone else? What is the similarities, I asked. No reply was given. I have now reached the state whereby I am not going to probe further if no disclosure is done. It does affect me though, even though I pretend that I could not care less. Even if it is being mentioned that I am affected, what can be done, for I don't think anything will change.

Life is now normal, a straight line. Good or bad? When life was a roller-coaster, the highs and lows were experienced. Good or bad?

To be a in state of apathy now, will things be better? Is not being emotional good? I don't know.

I have been a robot for a really long time now, till my life was turned upside down. I think I still care, but at the same time, I think I don't. I feel that I am doing it for my own selfish reasons, though I think not. I am already confused enough.

I do know what is happening but I refuse to see for what it is. I think.

Feeling stuffed, feeling tired ... feeling many things other than my true feelings, I feel. I don't want to break down anymore. It is not worth it.

Perhaps it is time to be true.

I don't even know anymore.