12th June 2008 - what a day.
I freaking hate that day. If only I had decided differently. Things may have turn out differently. Then again, maybe not. Certain things are beyond my control. The huge wound shall serve as a continuous reminder. The pain, difficulty and immobility. I think I may have thought of a certain image or a particular thought may have popped in and it has led to this. This huge wound that is taking some time to heal. Ironic isnt it .... The wound on my leg will need time to heal. Yet I am not doing anything to allow myself to heal.
My close friends have already advised me. There have been numerous incidents that have pointed out the decision that needs to be made. Yet, I refuse to heed this advice. How much longer am I going to do this to myself? How much longer.
I am honestly angry right now. Angry with so many things. I am angry with you. I feel like I hate you right now. I just want to scream my lungs out!!! DAMN IT !!!! DAMN YOU!!!!!
I am going to disappear.
I don't think it will affect you in any way. I don't think you will even shed one tear. And here I am, crying again.
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