Yesterday

I cried yesterday. I was already pissed off when I set off. When I couldn't find a parking lot, I was screaming my lungs out. I guess I was suppressing my tears since Day 1. True enough, tears begin to fall. I was just crying. It took awhile before the tears dried up. The place brought back many wonderful and at the same time painful memories. I truly enjoy every moment with you. However I remember that it was also at this same place, when you had asked about vacancies. I still remember it vividly even though it has been more than a year now. It seemed like it was just yesterday. I remembered a sinking feeling throughout the whole conversation. I was hoping that you would not go to that organization. I don't know if you are in a better place. At the end of the outing yesterday, again I cried. Seeing 2 other people at the outing brought out the tears. It was painful for me. I was yearning to call you. I just wanted to call off the time out. So what if it is momentary happiness, at least I was happy. I was truly upset yesterday. I just wanted to call you and to hear your caring voice once again. I miss you so much. i don't know how long this time-out will be. i feel like ending it already. I don't give a damn about this time-out anymore.
I miss you ...