Resurfacing

What a turn of events. It looks like a second major wave is about to hit. Sigh... I thought the calmness had arrived. I was wrong. I am still amazed that a good friend on the other side of the world suspected something when I did not even realize at all. I am tired of riding such waves. It is about time to head to shore. However the journey to return will be a tough and painful one. I cannot imagine having to do it all over again. It is like all the steps forward have been erased and I am now back to steps way even before square one. Why was I so stupid? Do I really enjoy torturing myself?

I truly thought I had recovered. I was wrong. The trigger happened again. I cannot imagine having to go through this all over again. Argh !!!!

I can only hope and pray to live one day at a time and focus on things that are important. I am glad that certain circumstances have happened that have made it better.

Please give me the strength to see this through.