I seriously hope it's the hormones. This morning, I had woken up with a heavy heart. I suddenly missed you. I have so much difficulty in letting go. When I had read one of the obituaries today "Without you in my life, it has no meaning and purpose." I remembered what it was like. I remembered how it was that how my life revolved around. I remembered how I wanted to take care of you and to protect you. I wouldn't even let you get wet in the rain. If only I had taken a step back then to reflect and to stay away then. I am in it so deep now that I am having much difficulty climbing out of it.
I wished I didn't feel this way. It really is silly that I am being emotional when you don't give a damn. That may be too harsh but how it has always been is that, you will do what suits you. You don't even feel a tiny bit about me. I don't even know if you treasure my friendship. And here I am, missing you.
I wonder when will I ever get better.
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