Painful

Had cried this morning. What a terrible start to the day. Had read a work email and I felt that it was not justified. I may be wrong as I did not think further. However I had really thought that it was fine. Sometimes I wonder if it is worth it. The harsh reality hurts.

I thought I was not affected by your updates yesterday. I may just be numbing myself. I was angry when I imagined that you are having fun. I don't want to deny you having fun. It is just really stupid of me to be in misery when you are really happy and having tonnes of fun.

When I think about what you are doing for the others and your recent treatment, I am upset. It really is stupid of me to have wasted my time, energy, effort, emotions and money. Oh well. That is the past. The past is the past.

I need to be in the present and look forward to the future. I have done all that I can. It was good to have deleted you from my msn. That helped tremendously. Now that I have deleted you from my facebook, it is complete cut-off from the cyber world. In the normal world, I have done all that I can.

I just now need to recover.